The world is growing darker as each day passes by, and it's tearing me apart. Your saddness is making me grow cold with saddness, as well. All of my friends...they're falling off the edge, and dragging me down with them. A lot of them want to die. A lot of them won't even tell me what the hell is wrong. They're blocking me out, and I don't know what to do because I'm trying *everything*. Suicide...is not the way to handle anything. I've been in these places. I just got done sitting in the bathroom with a razor in my hand, contemplating slicing away what's left. But I placed it back down. Because I'm not falling again. I refuse to go back to the darkest days of my life, and I refuse to let all of you get there, too.
When someone tells you they're there for you, let them be. If you need space, okay. But you need to let that person, or those people in, at some point. Because all they want to do is help and they love you. Don't hide it all under a facade, I had to find out from other people I don't even know that she was going to kill herself, and in fact had already attempted. I've been going around asking everyone else what's wrong with him because he won't open up. Don't let it come to this; don't leave your friends wondering, let them know you're okay, or you're not okay. If time is what you need, we'll give it...but time honestly doesn't run on forever. We love you guys. I love you guys.
I'm so scared to do anything...I've caused myself sickness, I keep crying because I hate to see the world in such a depression. Friends, lovers and fighters, be there for everyone out there. Be there for one another. Don't be afraid to take that one person's hand and let them know...how much you love them.
I love you Courtney.
I love you Tyler.
I love you all.
Keep the beauty.
-Kylie
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